So, they are willing to have open, serious conversations about the root causes and origins of their anxiety about English, their lack of confidence in their voice, their self-judgment and the symbolism that TOEFL has for them. To them, the past is worse than the unknown that I’m asking them to explore and step with me into. These students want to grow and become a new version of themselves. However, they didn’t have the tools to identify or overcome them. When they studied for TOEFL alone or with other tutors before, these students felt their Limiting Beliefs. I really want you to get the TOEFL scores you need, and… I am not the right teacher for you you.įor other students, my blend of coaching with English for TOEFL iBT is exactly what they were missing and what they’ve been hungry for. If this is you, please know that I wish you the best. Their conclusion is that lessons with me are “a waste.” The main difference is they are much angrier (or more depressed or even more hopeless) than they were before. Unfortunately, these people finish 4 months in lessons with me but they do not see much measurable progress on their goals. Despite my repeated efforts to light their fire, they keep pouring water on it. These people are typically unwilling to discuss any possible connection between their unending self-criticism and their fear of communicating in English and their low TOEFL scores. In class, when I identify how they got better or what their strengths are, they cut down the success and reject it or talk extensively about how their progress did not happen. And to them, it’s even more ridiculous to tell themselves they’re doing “a good job” because they aren’t. They think it’s silly or pointless to discuss their improvements, achievements or accomplishments. You will not see results if you give me the task of believing in you while you constantly criticize, sabotage and block your own success.įor some students, my discussion about Limiting Beliefs and “positive self-talk” is a threat to habits of self-hate they grew sadly familiar and comfortable with. You must actively participate by changing the thoughts you have about yourself. You cannot delegate “being confident” to someone else. It is as much your responsibility to believe in yourself as it is my responsibility. BUT… My belief has no power if students pour water on the fire. ![]() The people who defeated their test anxiety and strong physical reactions without medication, drugs or alcohol and ended a multi-year string of defeats at TOEFL by scoring their 26 on SpeakingĪll of these transformations that I’ve witnessed are the reasons why I don’t believe my students when they say “I can’t.” I know my students can. ![]() The people who are the first one in their group of friends who speak a certain native language and prove that people who speak that language can in fact score 26 at TOEFL Speaking. ![]()
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